I’m condemned to a week-long meeting soon, and it makes me want to put a shotgun in my mouth to even think about it. What can I do to make it more bearable?
I write down what people are saying, either typing or in a notebook. These aren’t actual notes that can be used later. It’s literally “hear word, write down word”. I find it helps me to stay concentrated on what is happening. Or at least it prevents me from engaging in other activity.
A week-long meeting? That’s a fresh new hell I have thankfully managed to dodge at this point.
I’m a conlanger, so I would just handwrite my notes in my own language and script, and be coining new words as needed. And doodling. Got me through lots of meetings and trainings.
What’s a conlanger?
I don’t know if I have HELPFUL advice, but I do have a very niche tip. I collect old Gameboy consoles. One of them is a Gameboy Micro. I use it when I’m in long pointless meetings. It’s small enough to palm when I’m asked a question.
I have an ongoing game of pokemon Emerald that I only play during meetings. I just beat Winona.
Bone conduction headphones, music of your choice. Only you can hear the music, and you can still hear everyone else around you as your ears aren’t covered.
I didn’t know this was a thing. It it good for loud environments that make you crazy too? Don’t suppose noise reduction factors it. I still might consider those just for this application, though.
I’d say so. Having some ambient or instrumental music to occupy my mind a bit makes things less overwhelming. But its not going to block out an airplane or anything.
You can always use them with earplugs, though.
The hearing aid phones? Can those be used for music!?
Nah these are specifically meant for music, I have a pair of Shockz but there are cheaper options as well.
It’s the same tech but there are some made for music just like regular.
Bring a quiet fidget toy.
Comp Sci. Slow peers. Droning profs. All day. It could have been hell.
4 colours of easy writing pens and a cover story about taking notes for someone else and there I was, taking notes in 4 colours for easy review and just enough arbitrary framework to keep me distracted.
Now that I one is creative. Sounds hard to do quickly though.
If it is a Zoom meeting, than I just allow myself to run around the room, listening to the meeting on the background.
Otherwise, if it is an in-person meeting, I do lots of things
- watch around, try to make notes of important things
- practice active listening, trying to validate my understanding by parahprasing statements I heard as questions to validate correctness of my understanding. Even if I can’t ask them — I write them down, this also forces the muscle memory to make me recall more
- if it is a presentation, I sometimes run further ahead, riding the content like waves — so when presenter gets to some point,
The most important thing, though, always is to accept the fact that you can miss some parts. Neurotypicals miss bits and pieces of information too — they just don’t think it is a bad thing, so it is fine if you miss something, or hear something incorrectly. It is completely fine to ask to repeat something, or to get some information later by asking your colleagues.
Take your meds if you have them. And like others said, write yourself a protocol. I personally hate doing that but it’s the only way I can stay focused in a meeting. In addition to that, everything I don’t immediately write down, I’ll forget in the next few minutes. Everyone’s always amazed by how well I can recall details of past meetings, when it’s actually the opposite lol
Oh oh I’ve got an actual potentially brilliant solution for you! 😁
It’s called an Infinity Cube. I’ve bought like 20 of them and given most of them away (I have 2 now lol). They’re not expensive but they have made a huge difference for me in being able to listen to people, period. I also use it for all the meetings I go to and in fact now I really notice what a struggle I go through if I forget to bring one.
The one I linked is made of smooth black, rigid, silky material and has a perfect weight to it. It’s also very quiet so people won’t notice you’re cycling it. I say cycle because that’s kind of what it does in a sort of infinite loop and I think that’s why it’s so perfect for the brain squirrels.
The other interesting thing I’ve noticed about it is that people more towards the AuDHD end of the spectrum don’t vibe with it at all. Letting someone I’m talking to play with it has almost become a way to stealthily test if they are my flavour of ADHD hehe
Lego set. My work offers a sensory room with Lego sets and other stimming toys. I have never listened so well to a meeting as with a new Lego set in front of me.
Bone-conductive headphones.
Take hand-written notes
Take them in cursive too if you’re not used to it. Learning cursive made taking notes actually pretty fun for me.
A… week long meeting? Surely there’s a more productive use of everyone’s time.
You’re right. We should have a meeting to discuss other ways to realize this productivity.
We need a meeting to make the agenda for that meeting. Also, going to need you all to show up in person for team synergy. I’ll provide pizza. We’re all a big family. Don’t worry, I’m grooming you for management.