Space Facts@lemmy.world to memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 4 天前Prioritieslemmy.imagisphe.reimagemessage-square53linkfedilinkarrow-up1643arrow-down110
arrow-up1633arrow-down1imagePrioritieslemmy.imagisphe.reSpace Facts@lemmy.world to memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 4 天前message-square53linkfedilink
minus-squareGreenKnight23@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkarrow-up19arrow-down1·4 天前because in the US you can’t kill yourself. if you try and fail you’ll be charged with a crime. corpses don’t generate profit. you will work until you die of “natural causes”.
minus-squarenightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyzlinkfedilinkarrow-up7·4 天前Fortunately, suicide by cop is a sure thing. Point a pencil in their direction and they’ll empty a clip on you.
minus-square[deleted]@piefed.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up7·4 天前Their aim sucks though, so have fun recovering in the ER where they won’t let you die.
minus-squareEcho Dot@feddit.uklinkfedilinkarrow-up3·4 天前Just don’t attempt to assassinate the president. Or else you risk getting arrested and having your shirt taken off, it’s all just a really uncomfortable interaction and not worth it.
minus-squaresome_kind_of_guy@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkarrow-up1·4 天前Still fine to go get the TV, though, yeah? I’m trying to complete my home theatre setup
minus-squareREDACTED@infosec.publinkfedilinkarrow-up2arrow-down1·4 天前Because commenter above feels like it
Wait, why?
because in the US you can’t kill yourself. if you try and fail you’ll be charged with a crime.
corpses don’t generate profit. you will work until you die of “natural causes”.
Fortunately, suicide by cop is a sure thing. Point a pencil in their direction and they’ll empty a clip on you.
Their aim sucks though, so have fun recovering in the ER where they won’t let you die.
Just don’t attempt to assassinate the president. Or else you risk getting arrested and having your shirt taken off, it’s all just a really uncomfortable interaction and not worth it.
Still fine to go get the TV, though, yeah? I’m trying to complete my home theatre setup
Because commenter above feels like it