Every day just seems to bring more problems that accumulate faster than I can fix them.
One of those problems was finding a family friend dead on his bathroom floor. He had stopped taking his medications and replaced them with Busch. He spent his last few days in a drunken stupor until his heart gave out.
What I seem to be struggling with the most is that I’m not sad that he’s gone. I’m not even angry that he gave up. I think I’m jealous that he found a way out.
I have not had an experience like that but I can 100% understand your feeling. I feel like im becoming weaker. Like if everything went back to a decent situation im not sure I could still handle it.
If I found myself in a decent situation, I’d probably on the lookout for the inevitable BIGGER disaster to slap me back in place.
that to.