He turned water into wine by pressing it with his massive swole thighs.
And he blessed the fish and loaves with his swole biceps and lo, they did turn into pure whey protein powder.
And Lazarus did die, but then Jesus bench pressed the death out of him so hard he came back to life.
And he could walk on water because he punched a wave so hard the ocean was scared of him forever and kept him from sinking.
And the giant boulder in front of his tomb? He wasn’t dead and buried, that was his exercise boulder and he just sat it down to have a power nap before lifting the mountain by himself.
man was turning water into whey
He turned water into wine by pressing it with his massive swole thighs.
And he blessed the fish and loaves with his swole biceps and lo, they did turn into pure whey protein powder.
And Lazarus did die, but then Jesus bench pressed the death out of him so hard he came back to life.
And he could walk on water because he punched a wave so hard the ocean was scared of him forever and kept him from sinking.
And the giant boulder in front of his tomb? He wasn’t dead and buried, that was his exercise boulder and he just sat it down to have a power nap before lifting the mountain by himself.