32m just starting to become more comfortable around women. I’ve just been telling myself to start small and ask how one is doing in passing. Just curious to hear from those with more experience and success with women through trial and error

  • CrocodilloBombardino@piefed.socialEnglish
    3·
    2 days ago

    If the confidence you want is for dating purposes, you need to get comfortable with:

    • figuring out what situations you’re comfortable in where single women are present: not one for clubs and bars? What about pickleball or ceramics or a book club? Try new things that have some chance of having people you want to date.
    • figuring out what specifically makes you uncomfortable, then facing it. Is it fear of rejection? Fear of being vulnerable? Certain kinds of social situations? Understand that rejection is part of learning and vulnerability is required (in appropriate amounts based on context) to connect.
    • don’t hyperfixate on any one woman or one event. Spotted a baddie? Go for it if she seems open to interaction, but don’t make getting her contact info into a make or break for your whole night.
    • learn to spot cues and hints that someone is or isn’t into having or continuing an interaction: is she trying to put effort into conversion with you or shutting it down (even politely)?
    • Stay a million miles away from the toxic “manosphere” and their incel fuckery. There is nothing of value there.