I (22M, heterosexual) am interested in a sensual and affectionate form of intimacy involving purely oral stimulation. My desire is entirely centered on kissing and being kissed as a way to exchange love and pleasure (with oral sex being an extension of kissing). It is so hot to me that it is genuinely all I want, and penetrative forms of sex do not interest me. (Due to medical issues, they also might not work super well at this point.)
I have never had a sexual partner because I was raised with a traditional model of intimacy in which an active male partner penetrates a passive female partner. Since my desires did not fit this framework, I never tried to even date anyone, believing that the type of intimacy I wanted - one in which both partners took turns giving and receiving oral pleasure - was impossible. At least, not without having to participate in an activity that didn’t arouse me.
I am not nearly as ignorant as I was back then, but I would like to know if there is a general dating strategy to efficiently narrow things down to women who aren’t interested in or don’t require penetrative sex.
Does anyone know of someone in a similar situation who found a compatible partner regardless? If so, how did they do it?
Have you talked to a therapist? I’m not saying there’s anything wrong, nor would I have the expertise to. But it sounds like there might be more there than people on Lemmy are capable of helping with.
Just want to throw out that something doesn’t have to be wrong to benefit from therapy. Everyone can benefit from talking things through with an unbiased third party.
That’s what I meant. I’m saying I think therapy can help, but that doesn’t mean something is wrong. Nor would I be qualified to say if something was.
Therapy is for everyone. If you have something you’re struggling with, therapy can help.