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Joined 8 days ago
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Cake day: April 25th, 2026

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  • Tbh, women wouldn’t admit to doing this either - there’s absolutely a shame around women having to make friends with an AI (because we’re meant to be innately social I guess). And I don’t think that other women realize that they are contributing to the issues of women feeling shame using AI by implying it’s a male issue and all about sex and toxic masculinity.

    Like as a woman who has used AI, how am I supposed to feel about admitting that I’ve done something that only asshole, horny, incels do (according to a lot of people)?

    So the stigma goes all ways and none of it helps anyone. People just need to be more curious than judgemental. Someone does something you don’t understand? That’s okay you don’t understand. Ask them why. Listen. Try to see a different perspective instead of just filling in the gaps with incel, men, sex, ugly, etc. etc.


  • And do people really believe that women don’t talk to AI companions, in various forms, too?

    I’m a woman and I spoke to one of the apps for a while because I was bloody lonely (still am 🤷‍♀️). Had zero to do with men or murder. I didn’t have anyone, of either gender, to connect with.

    It’s really easy to just reduce this to a male issue, a toxic masculinity, a male violence issue. We need to go deeper than that if we actually want to understand why people, men, women, everyone, use different AI.

    But threads like this, with all the judgement, aren’t going to get a lot of people who admit they use/have used/have considered using AI. By just criticising/laughing, etc at people who do it, ironically, we turn more people towards the AIs.


  • I think you’re making some interesting observations. I definitely agree that it’s the easy answer to just dismiss people who use AI therapists, friends, relationships are just stupid.

    You’re right that it says something about the system we live in and I extend that to society in general. We have a society who criticizes people for answering “how are you” honestly, who doesn’t have time for each other, who use terms like “trauma dumping” - so personally, I can see why some people are turning to machines whether it’s therapy or connection. It’s really bloody sad and it’s not a good solution but I can see the WHY behind it - which is what I think you’re also getting at.

    We do need to listen to why people turn to these services and figure out what people aren’t finding in human connection that they are, or think they are, in machines. I don’t buy that an individuals intelligence has much to do with why people turn to AI.


  • Yeah disability history should actually be taught. I’m disabled and I work in the industry too. It’s sad how little the average person knows about the history of disability…yet they sure know a lot about over-diagnoses and all kinds of other headline crap 🤔🙄

    I’m not in the US but absolutely, we had de-institutionalisation in the 90s here (Australia). There are plenty of adults who lived during that time and still flinch at certain actions (a harmless high 5 for example) because they’re conditioned to being hit. There are still plenty of adults who are institutionalised in their mindset and will never overcome that sadly (incredibly strict routines they can’t deviate from even though the routines themselves are damaging, no body autonomy or discretion, no ability to voice their opinion, needs and so on). It’s really sad to watch because their routine that can involve going to a day service program every day is obviously causing them distress but any suggestion of change to that schedule is also incredibly distressing. For a lot of people, that part of institutionalisation is irreversible and it affects their entire quality of life.

    Scarily there are still staff in the industry that worked in those places too. I remember really not liking a coworker - I didn’t work with her directly but on the few occasions I’d seen her interact with clients I just thought she was disrespectful and old school. Then I had a client who used to say some things about her that I actually reported to management. Eventually someone mentioned in passing that this worker had worked at one of the biggest institutions in my state - the one that they teach us about in the disability certificate because of how abusive and horrific it was.

    It is current history and the history of disability treatment and institutionalisation, abuse, neglect, murder, abandonment - all of this history has a trickle down affect - disabled people who haven’t necessarily faced all of those things often still know the history and carry the anxiety and fear around it - especially in the midst of these big public discussions that are happening in various countries. It’s essentially inter-generational trauma being handed down.

    It also affects how non disabled people view disabled people - even without knowing it. Disabled people are often told they should “be grateful” for what we have now - even when we’re making a point about having our rights violated. The idea that disabled people are “lesser” is deeply ingrained in society. It’s not even conscious so it’s not always malicious but it’s just deep seated due to history.

    ( It IS malicious and wilfully ignorant if it’s pointed out to you and you double down on your ableist rhetoric. Recognizing and challenging our own prejudices is a skill worth having!)


  • I really wouldn’t be downplaying how the Nazis treated disabled people. They were literally experimented on, tortured while still alive in some of the most horrific ways until they died. Disabled children were taken from their parents (sometimes willing, sometimes not) and abused until they died. Some of the parents would realize that the situation was not what they thought it was and try to get their child back but couldn’t. There are letters from teenagers writing to their parents - “I am going to die here” (in the institution) because the parents weren’t able to get them out. Those kids did die. And we don’t even have the full scope of numbers because documentation was destroyed and deaths were simply labelled as pneumonia when there were clearly other things at play.

    I don’t think comparison is helpful here. Disabled people have ALWAYS been treated like shit by a large amount of society and people in power. Some of it has changed over time, going back way further than the 1930/40s, some of it has improved but not as much as people would like to think sadly.

    There’s still a lot of deep seated ableism that permeates through society which is why any progress in the way disabled people are spoken to, about and how we’re treated in general, is so incredibly painstakingly slow and often feels like one half step forward, whoaaa that’s a bit too much, shuffle back 3 steps!





  • Ah yeah I’m still getting my head around the whole instances thing but good to know so thanks for that. I’d honestly never even heard the term of federated in regards to socials/forums etc before looking up alternatives to reddit 😅

    Also what the actual fuck with those military dogs, sickening stuff. Very disturbing when humans are using other animals to humiliate and assault people like that. The dogs don’t have the same understanding of what they’re doing as humans would so, to me, that lays entirely on the people who are training and encouraging dogs to engage in that kind of stuff - the intention comes from the human. Ugh, that was a disturbing read!