Fuck no

Every paycheck for twenty plus years, I calmly and without complaint saw taxes and fica taken out of each check because that’s how you have a social safety net.

I sure as fuck didn’t pay in because I could afford it, I paid in because it’s mandatory.

So you, me, whoever, is 100% justified in using the social safety net we all paid and pay into because that’s what it’s for in the first place.

Never, ever feel guilty about it brougham.

When I bought a laptop after self publishing my first book, I went with a thinkpad specifically because they handle linux so well. t480

That’s been a few years now, and it’s still running smooth, no issues at all, even with mint having been upgraded a few times.

Those are different things, and I think it important to say that because your question reads like you’re conflating them, when you aren’t; you’re asking how far it does stretch, not saying that locker rooms are the same as a social club.

Which isn’t directed at you, but any passersby that didn’t catch it

As far as that goes, I’m actually okay with shared lockers/showers/bathrooms, so long as you can find privacy as an individual. Stalls with good isolation for them what care in other words. I don’t, however, think it would be okay to enforce that at this point in time

Sure, of course they are.

I’ll even go so far as to say that even more fine grained groups are okay. What becomes a problem is when every group excludes people that really shouldn’t be.

You get a chess club, why the fuck can’t a woman join? Right? Calling it a men’s club is just exclusionary for no purpose. Even the girl/boy Scout divide was pointless in any real sense, and was a missed opportunity for those scouts to have guidance on how a scout is supposed to treat others.

Hell, when it comes right down to it, even a specific cis organization is fine, just the way trans specific ones are. The problem, again, is when a club is exclusionary just for the sake of it.

We all have aspects of our lives that aren’t shared by people with other genders and/or types of genitals. There’s struggles and discrete experiences that a trans man can have that I never will, and vice versa.

But, again, once it ceases to be about that kind of specificity, it starts being bigotry in disguise and needs to fuck right off. Ain’t no good reason women shouldn’t be allowed into things like community action groups. A gender division there is just pointless and stupid. If they also exclude trans men, it’s as bad (maybe even worse).

Hell, the masons are full of shit in that regard. Fraternal orders are hypothetically okay, but since when have the masons actually been about men sharing the unique aspects of life that men share? It’s just exclusionary bullshit (and I’ve seen it from the inside, so I know it’s utter bullshit). They’re the best example of how not to be a gender based organization.

I’m not saying that men shouldn’t be able to gather and just hang out. We should, as should women. There really is a different vibe, and there’s no way around that. But once you start organizing that on a bigger scale, you have a different threshold to meet.

Since, historically, most of the men’s organizations not only excluded women, but actively served to continue oppression of women, being a de facto patriarchal enforcement group, those groups get the worst attention. They weren’t really men’s groups, they were power control groups that men only could use to gain, maintain, and exploit control. That’s why there’s pushback on them, not the fact that they were/are gendered.

My chicken, Sesame, would like a word with you.

I don’t think they approach necessity tbh. At best, they’re a bandaid, and a crutch for parents.

But the drawbacks of the laws that have been implemented so far, and are trying to be, as vast overreaches that give a false sense of security with no real benefit. They also do that by placing even more information into the hands of the very companies causing the problem in the first place.

That’s where regulations would focus in an ideal world, limiting the companies from causing the problems in the first place, not slapping bad patches over them.

You don’t ignite the sacrifice, you place it on a pyre.

Those can burn hot when well constructed. Not quite the kind of heat a modern crematorium can produce, so it is slower. But it wouldn’t have been a full day of burning.

Cooking can take longer than burning. If you threw your steak directly into fire, it would be inedible in the same amount of time it would be medium rare on the grill above the fire (as a rough example, don’t expect precision here), and burnt into a brick in maybe fifteen minutes at most. I’ve lost meat in just coals before, and that’s about all it took, so an open fire would likely be even faster.

Waaay back in the day, to the best I’ve ever read, most sacrifices that were burnt weren’t single sacrifices. This means the fires were also bigger, more intense, than what you might have in your home fireplace. So, once the sacrifice was on the heat, it would ignite relatively quickly. Then, you’ve got fats rendering and burning, which burns pretty damn hot; hot enough that you’d only need an hour or two for the bones to fragment.

Think about it (or look it up if you have a strong stomach), people and animals caught in house fires aren’t in them for massive amounts of time, but they’re essentially carbonized well down towards the bones, and sometimes the bones are “falling apart” (there’s fancy terms for that, but I can’t be arsed to pull them from memory) in the time it takes for the structure to collapse.

Anyway, the rules of sacrifice really varied. In some cases, they weren’t actually burnt, they were cooked. It was the taking of the life that was the sacrifice, so burning wasn’t always part of it. Iirc, it was mostly sun, fire, and similar gods that fire sacrifice to destruction weres the norm. But general purpose sacrificed animals were sometimes cooked and eaten. It really varied a lot over the millennia across the world.

One aspect was though, the burning of the sacrifice was so that it could “rise” to the god/s. A form of transubstantiation, destroying the earthly form and sending it to the divine in its constituent essence. In other aspects, the fire was the god or gods consuming the sacrifice.

Fwiw, if you stack the pyre right, with enough fuel, a human body is reduced to ask and bone fragments in maybe six to eight hours. Something with less mass (a lamb as an example) will be faster.

Plus, some of the really big sacrifices were done en masse in huge fires. Literally tons of wood, often resinous woods that burn hot enough to damage stone at that scale. Can’t recall where, but there’s sacrifice spots that had stone show some melting, which is fucking hot.

To sum up, I guess the answer is that it depends on when and where the sacrifice happened, and why.

Yeah, and that’s how you get shitty age verification laws.

It’s a double edged sword

Aight, I get that OP is what you might call a repeat offender when it comes to posting things over and over. But the issue is still a significant one.

So, anyone scrolling through the responses here so far is going to see two main things said.

One, that it’s hygiene, and/or that it’s an “infection” (though that term isn’t fully accurate).

There’s more to the story than that.

Talking specifically about the “fishy” odor, not any of the others possible on human genitals (because it isn’t just women that can have that particular odor), hygiene isn’t usually the driving factor. It’s typically going to be an imbalance in the microbiome of the genitals, particularly the vaginal canal, or the presence of an unfamiliar microbe.

Trichomoniasis, a condition caused by an invading protozoan, is usually going to be the cause of a strong, unpleasant rotten-fishy type of smell. It’s also got other symptoms, but that’s not the thrust of this. But it is absolutely not a hygiene issue. Doesn’t matter what kind of routine you have, it isn’t going to prevent it.

The less pungent “fishy” smells tend to be more about the usual assortment of microbes we all have on us at all times being disturbed enough that one or another is outcompeting the others. Bacterial vaginosis is what that’s called. It isn’t so much an infection as it is something going wacky. Now, this can be triggered by bacteria from a foreign source getting into the vagina, or even just onto the vagina in enough numbers that it throws things out of equilibrium. This may or may not be a result of sexual activity.

Again though, hygiene isn’t a primary factor. If anything, people going nuts over washing or using shitty products is more likely to cause problems than just not bathing. You start screwing up the Ph of the genitals, and germs throw a rave. Lack of bathing doesn’t tend to cause short term trouble, and even once enough oil and dead skin builds up to grow colonies in abundance, doesn’t tend to get fishy as much as that cheesy, funky, slightly rotten smell. And, even then, if everything stays balanced, you might not have any excess odor, it’s just that it’s possible.

If a person is using conservative methods with their genitals, isn’t fighting an active infection, and also isn’t doing a lot of crazy shit, they can still have what might get called fishy, but really isn’t what people think of. Our slime, be it boogers in our noses, rectal mucosa, vaginal fluids, or whatever tend to have a sort of meaty undertone. That protein smell is also kinda what fresh fish smells like if the fish isn’t very oily. Think something like bream, maybe catfish, rather than tuna. That’s just always there, underneath whatever personal variances there might be.

However, some personal variances do run closer to something like salmon or mahimahi. It isn’t going to be super strong in most cases, though you do run into it occasionally. But it isn’t an unpleasant scent, just very “meaty”.

Also, I want to repeat that it isn’t only vaginas an vulvae that carry these smells. Penises definitely can smell fishy. Don’t forget that parts of the penis are mucous membranes too, so they’ll produce the same basic range of aromas.

Since it often comes up, there are right and wrong ways to wash your junk. There are also ways that aren’t necessarily wrong, but will give outcomes that aren’t really desirable either.

The current best practices are the same ones I used for twenty years while washing other people’s junk. I look them up any time I talk about this subject because there’s always one asshole (at least) that wants to claim it’s bullshit. But I was responsible for the skin health, including genital health, of hundreds of men and women, and it was a source of great pride that my patients never stank. If you factor in pediatrics cases, and cases where I wasn’t a long term caregiver (subbing in for a weekend or whatever), that number gets into the thousand + range far enough I can’t keep track.

There is the caveat that some medical issues may require a change to general best practices. If that’s the case for anyone, consult whatever doctor/provider is guiding your care for your individual needs, this is all general purpose.

So, those best practices are to use no soap, minimum abrasion, and ideally only warm water (not hot). You don’t need a washcloth, but definitely avoid anything that feels scratchy. Your bare hands and warm, running water are all it takes, period. Yes, even during one’s period. Anything else is to satisfy ones mind, not cleanse the genitals, and that’s okay if that’s what you want.

But soap strips oils more than is ideal for genitals, and it dries out mucous membranes. This is a recipe for bacteria to set up a factory and go crazy. It is entirely possible to kick off a bacterial vaginosis issue from over zealous bathing, especially when soaps not well designed for genitals are used. There are soaps on the market that are designed to gently cleanse genitals.

The problem is figuring out which of those that claim to do the job right actually do. Most of the time, if in doubt, go to a medical supplies place and see what kind of perineal care products there are, compare ingredients with whatever you’re wanting to buy that is available in a regular store, and be prepared to experiment with what does and doesn’t help your skin.

The other big part is to rinse well and dry thoroughly. A lot of skin issues start with moisture hanging around. Most of the time, you can go out, get sweaty as hell, and not bathe, and still have zero issues if you dry yourself well along the way. Jock itch, as an example, doesn’t come from being sweaty, it comes from staying damp. You can’t always help that while out in the world, but you definitely can after your shower. If you’re time crunched, a blow dryer on a warm or cool setting can get the job done.

I personally do use soap on occasion, if I’ve been doing something grimy enough that it’s gotten everywhere. So it doesn’t have to be fanatical. But overall, the less you fuck with your genitals’ balance with soaps, scents, or anything else, the less trouble you’ll have with unpleasant odors.

I wish I could keep goats here. I’ve always had a love of the little buggers, even the ornery ones.

Those eyes are part of that, though it’s more the personality. I wish you and yours all the joy life can bring you

They do exist, though I dunno if you’d find any examples online

But they suck for most uses because there aren’t number words.

Like, in print or cursive, the word “pool” exists as a distinct combination of letters that can be recognized even with sloppy writing. I’m using that as an example because I’m dyslexic and that’s one of my favorite examples of how I manage to read as fast or faster than someone that isn’t.

However, 1984, 1776, 2025, they don’t necessarily have the same “weight” in memory where you would recognize them if the numbers are connected.

And with math connected numbers would be a shit show from top to bottom.

So there’s really no use case for learning connected numbers. They aren’t useful, and cause problems. Why learn Cyrillic if you never run into books printed in it? Even that would be a more useful thing to teach in schools than connected numbers. There’s no good reason for connected numbers except for private notation. Even then, you’d not save much time unless you’re writing a shit ton of numbers, and you’d better be able to practice both doing them and reading them if you want those notes to be useful later.

Afaik, nobody uses them at all nowadays. For anything. So finding instructions on how to do it isn’t likely online (though I’m going to check just out of curiosity and edit in if I find it). It would be unlikely to find any of the old texts that teach it even in a decent book collection.

Couldn’t find any, but decided to do an example from memory

As you can see, even discounting my shitty skills in writing on screen, there’s some serious issues with reading connected numbers.

That goat is photogenic as fuck!

And a tru enviro-homie to boot.

They get called the feebs by some folks

I know you asked for women here, so please forgive second hand info and a small bit of personal interjection.

You’re far from the first woman to express that feeling. I’ve heard similar many times, and damn near exactly that a handful of times.

Yes, as folks have said, it’s most often from people that end up being trans or some variety of non binary/agender once they figure out what labels do feel right, but it isn’t exclusively that. There’s some folks that have dissonance with the label not because they aren’t women, but because the label of it carries social baggage that doesn’t match their inner self, rather than womanhood not matching their self.

I’ve had conversations about it because my own sense of masculinity and manhood (not necessarily the same thing) often didn’t fit external concepts, leading to friction. Something as minor as having long hair was enough to cause social friction that made my journey as a boy becoming a man rockier than it should have been.

What I’ve had expressed to me by women that are cis, and place themselves on the binary is as much about not being able to integrate what they sense in themselves with external concepts. Even when they fit those external concepts like enjoying makeup, there can be a disconnect so great as to make them wonder if maybe they’re trans simply because the way the world treats women can be so damn wrong. That kind of dissonance needs resolution eventually.

I will say that femininity is no more rigid than masculinity. For the most part, the real defining limit is what the person finds as their own expression of masculinity or femininity. When they find that balance where their own sense of self is no longer dependent on those external concepts and pressures, that’s when real femininity comes into play. A tomboy can be just as feminine as your prototypical “girly girl”. It’s just a different expression of femininity that happens to also match some aspects traditionally labeled as masculine.

Really, when it comes right down to it, we all have to find our own self-labels and balance them with our concepts of masculinity/femininity.

Going back to my personal journey, I discovered that part of my internalized masculinity is wrapped up in being exactly who and what I am, as a man, and to hell with external concepts. I’d be just as masculine, as much a man in high heels and skirt singing Celine Dion because I’m in balance with my masculinity. This was not always the case. The few times I did drag as a bit of fun felt decidedly un masculine because at the time, I’d never had to evaluate how much gender roles and appearances actually mattered to my own sense of self.

So, while you didn’t ask this at all, I would say that if you want to be called a woman, you deserve it, period. Doesn’t really matter if you’re trans, cis, or other, you’re as valid a woman as any other.

Now, that doesn’t mean you have to have the goal of internalizing that label in order to be a woman, you don’t. But you can also be very feminine in how you present yourself and not be a woman, and you’d deserve to not be called one either.

hype? Pretty much any because hype is almost always artificial.

But fans? I can’t say any band/performers don’t deserve their fan base. You pull the crowds that need what you’re making, so you inherently deserve them.

I can say that some fans do over hype the talents of what they like. It’s perfectly okay to be a middle range musician, and it’s perfectly fine to like them and recommend them exactly as they are.

Like, backstreet boys. Solid pop boy band. Had some great songs, but most were just okay pop. None of the members can really be compared to someone like Freddy Mercury, or Pavarotti, or Marvin Gaye, but they all had good voices to some degree or another and used them well. But their fan base back in the day was all about the hype, the fannishness of it. So they got hyped way beyond what they were.

That’s the curse of a lot of pop performers, and it is the curse of teen/tween targeted pop for sure.

A lot of that kind of performer has to totally undo their family friendly (which is a bullshit term to begin with) focus to ever really grow musically. Look at pretty much every Disney escapee for examples. Timberlake, arguably the best example of someone escaping that trap without having to piss off the original fan base, still drags some of that curse with him while producing some very good pop music.

Now, KISS? Since that’s the example in the post, I think you run into the trouble of hindsight. At the time they gained their initial popularity and success, they were a damn great live band. A KISS show back then was something most people had never seen, and the hype was justified

But they suffer from the success curse. Other people took what they did and did it better. So now the hype is essentially all nostalgia, so it feels out of place. Legit, go back and check out footage of their live shows and compare it to the standard rock bands of the same eras. It wasn’t until they went full idiot and tried to abandon the makeup (and all that went with it) that they lost the thread. At that point, they kept trying to summon up what they’d lost and never regained their mojo. At this point, a KISS show just doesn’t do justice to what the hype says. It can’t, because it isn’t the same band despite being mostly the same people.

But they were always mid tier songwriters (even the ones I fucking love were mid tier compared to a band like The Band that I tend to enjoy less).

So, that kind of thing is why I don’t jump on hype or shit on hype. It’s usually artificial, and it’s also usually generated by dint of numbers. So hype never carries well.

But it’s also why I never object or care about someone like Taylor Swift having a massive fan base either. She writes and performs for her target audience. She does that very well, no matter what else anyone thinks about her. Any pop performer is trying to do exactly that. Even niche subgenre performers that are actually trying to sell their music try to find a way to target a fan base (even if it’s only people that would object to being called a fan base).

I would, at this point in my life, also say that at least checking out hype can be worth it. Even if you don’t like whatever it is, you’ve shared something with other people, and that’s a net positive. Plus, you might run into a few songs you do like from someone you don’t otherwise enjoy (like shake it off from Swift for me)

Well, yeah, it’s normal.

When you find goodness in the world, and it shares a common denominator, it is perfectly normal to develop some degree or another of affection/attachment for that common denominator. You don’t have to be depressed for that, it just makes it easier.

It can turn into an unhealthy obsession, and it’s possible that the motivations may not be without strings (cults and such), but those aren’t going to be the case every time.

Like, for me, I have a deep and abiding love for gay culture, specifically gay male culture, because of how much love I have received from that subculture. That has expanded over the years to embrace the entire rainbow of the LGBTQ+ community (with some extra affection for my trans folks). You go for a while needing acceptance and open appreciation, you’re going to end up returning it when a specific group is where you find it.

Truth is that the more sub a subculture is, the more likely the people in it are to be outsiders in some way. Maybe marginalized, maybe just atypical; but whether they were individually outsiders that found solidarity, or they became such by joining the subculture, outsiders have a tendency to be at least a little more accepting of other outsiders (though you run into some weird shit where you get schisms sometimes).

And it can be local. As an example, I’ve had universally great interactions with juggalos in my area, but they can be major dicks in other places. As another, furries tend to be really chill with non furries that accept them but can have bitter faction wars with each other.

Don’t let yourself get sucked into any cult shit, but otherwise find the goodness of humanity wherever you can, and enjoy it. Nothing wrong with that

Of course, at least under normal circumstances.

Like humans or wild animals, a pet is going to have their full sensory array available. Even a blind and deaf animal can pick up vibrations as someone approaches then, feel changes in air movement, etc.

Since hands are different sizes, even if they were asleep at the moment of contact, it wouldn’t take long to figure out whose hand was on them. Obviously , that might be negated if the hands are similar enough, but I would suspect that even then the differences in how a person pets them would be useful.

You could likely create a situation to bypass everything and “fool” a pet, but that’s what you’d have to do.

Don’t worry, by the time you hit fifty-ish, you won’t have energy for rage any more lol.

Tbh, even the least well designed apps are a better experience overall. Lemmy via browser is often a drag.

Because it’s not a website. It’s a connected network of sites that requires a bit of a learning curve to really use.