maybe op was doing it a lot

and/or the litter was plutonium or something

edit: I think the phrasing was intended to be hyperbolic

This was an interesting choice of image for the JFK mention.

it’s regular capitalism but without pesky things like “environmental laws” and “human rights”

And everything memorized must be available for a timed 0.5-3 hour session with no access to any kind of notes, which risks destroying any chance of those memories “sticking” long term.

The only times in my adult life where

1. Time was crucial

AND

2. I had no access to any helpful information

was never

All it did was exacerbate my underlying mental health issues while my brain was developing.

New York Times, February 21st, 2026:

Trump invades Iceland

I’ve been admitted twice

At both facilities, other patients who required more ‘intensive care’ generally didn’t interact with the patients with more manageable symptoms. So I don’t have any really wild stories.

At worst, I’d hear screaming in the middle of the night. I’m a heavy sleeper, so it probably happened a lot more than I noticed.

I went in with the doctors knowing that I had a problem with illegal drugs (I admitted it), so I followed all the rules. (Possibly limiting my knowledge of any highly notable events)

Another dude, a few years older than me, had that same pre-condition, except the doctors had to burn a few piss tests to figure that out.

He knew where all the CCTV cameras and their blind spots were. Smuggled contraband and non-contraband via WhatsApp and fence-toss. Performed the role of “lookout” for patients seeking to indulge in intimate relations.

Like I said, I followed the rules, but I didn’t snitch, because that shit was entertaining.

Another patient was law enforcement. Let us know that officers who arrive to work drunk don’t really get into trouble because it’s so prevalent.

One nurse smoked secretly (in a CCTV blindspot)

That’s all I can recall for now.

“Broadcast English”

Interesting term

I’ve always noticed that In movies and TV shows, North American accents mostly sound “normal”. But when I talk to Americans/Canadians in person or online over voice chat, I cannot pinpoint the accents, it just sounds “American” to me.

I almost never hear the

“I’m walkin here”

“Folks won’t take kindly to you around these parts”

“I pahked my cah at the Hahvahd yahd”

“I’m sorey aboot that”

I’m totally down, I just need to, like, check my schedule?

etc.

kinds of exaggerated accents

everyone sounds like someone from CNN to me and then they say they’re from Arkansas or something

Fortunately, I don’t think there’s a fraction of that specific kind of tension.

My guess is 40-50 years from now, people will probably just call it Gqeberha or some other more catchy nickname.

Interesting thought

I don’t think the other nations are too bothered by it in most cases.

The country that comes to mind first is Germany. They call it Deutschland. I never looked into why we as English speakers call it “Germany”. I just do it because everyone else does.

I haven’t heard of Germans getting upset about it. If they were legitimately offended, I’d start calling it Deutschland, no problem.

The real issues come in when there’s a historical context. Like, if the name contains a slur for the people in that nation. Or if you mix up the names of neighbouring Balkan countries.

Come to think of it, I don’t hear about it as often as I probably should.

Government officials, the news and people in other professional contexts call it Gqeberha, frequently struggling with the click sound, even when a “k” sound will suffice.

Otherwise, I still hear people call it “P.E.”

“Port Elizabeth” was still kind of a mouthful

People I meet from the Eastern Cape just say they’re from “the Eastern Cape”, because unfortunately most people don’t know where Nxuba or Makhanda is.

Hell, a lot of people think Gqeberha/P.E. is the capital city of the Eastern Cape. (Bhisho is the capital)

Seeing Cape Town Stadium get renamed to DHL Stadium pissed me off so hard

This might sound silly, but going to that stadium, I felt an indescribable sense of community with everyone who showed up to support whatever artist/band/sports team was there . So many people, with a shared interest, in one place.

Since I live further out of Cape Town, I rarely get to experience that.

That piss yellow logo DHL logo everywhere ruined the experience so fucking much.

KINDLY REMEMBER YOUR GLOBAL CORPORATE OVERLORDS WHO ARE NOT SORRY FOR KEEPING TICKET PRICES HIGHER THAN THEY NEED TO BE. ALSO, FUCK YOU. REMEMBER TO GAMBLE.

Never install a camera in a bathroom

Like, you don’t install anthrax in a maternity ward

To access the verification can in your fridge, you could order another 6 pack of verification cans on sale at $partner© at $current_price + $arbitrary_markup $current_price

He’s not accusing televangelist fraudsters, war criminals, or deceptive, charismatic, powerful world leaders that threaten religious freedom.

Isn’t that him and his entire social circle?

if you asked a random person off the street:

hi which one of these people do you think is most likely the Antichrist:

1. Greta Thunberg (Climate Activist)
2. Eliezer Yudkowsky (AI researcher)
3. Peter Thiel (Chairman of Palantir)

I’m going to guess most people will pick option 3.

I didn’t even know who Eliezer was, I just skimmed his Wikipedia page.

I’m an atheist, but hearing about a billionaire defense contractor who goes on rants about the antichrist makes me think “hmm maybe this dude is the Antichrist”.

It just reminds me too much of those super anti-paedophilia guys who make anti-paedophilia their entire personality and then turn out to have terabytes of CSAM on their laptop.

So it looks like they’ll hire just about anyone

What’s the end goal? Have 99% of the American work force under the DHS?

And then what?

If your borders are so tightly controlled, you’re going to turn away enough false positives that everything else will crawl to a halt.

That’s in an entirely “efficient” scenario.

You’re hiring people who are desperate for money, i.e. people who are more likely to accept bribes, which just completely undermines this whole stupid system.

It just seems to me like they’re trying to maximise both bureaucracy and immense cruelty. Am I missing something?

The Economist has a tendency to put out articles seemingly designed to make conservatives bust nuts through their trousers at mach 4

Is Lucifer’s Poison Ivy destroying the fabric of civilization as we know it?

fecal transplants

wait

does this mean “eat shit” counts as unsolicited medical advice

Also, doesn’t this shit just waste like a fuckton of taxpayer money?

Yeah I assume OP intended to imply that you have some kind of significant influence on the actions taken by the aliens.

A regular alien won’t be able to do jackshit about it

You’d have to organise, protest, vote, zlorp, boycott ⟟⋏⊬⏃⏁ etc.

and you probably won’t have much time

At least you’ll know reincarnation is real

After they nuke earth you could go to a few alien maternity wards and interrogate every alien baby on the off chance one of them is someone from earth you know

or just do whatever their version of gooning is

(a) Organizations and Conferences

(1) Insist on doing everything through “channels.” Never permit short-cuts to be taken in order to expedite decisions.

(2) Make “speeches.” Talk as frequently as possible and at great length. Illustrate your “points” by long anecdotes and accounts of personal experiences …

(3) When possible, refer all matters to committees, for “further study and consideration.” Attempt to make the committees as large as possible—never less than five.

(4) Bring up irrelevant issues as frequently as possible.

(5) Haggle over precise wordings of communications, minutes, resolutions.

(6) Refer back to matters decided upon at the last meeting and attempt to re-open the question of the advisability of that decision.

(7) Advocate “caution.” Be “reasonable” and urge your fellow-conferees to be “reasonable” and avoid haste which might result in embarrassments or difficulties later on.

(8) Be worried about the propriety of any decision—raise the question of whether such action as is contemplated lies within the jurisdiction of the group or whether it might conflict with the policy of some higher echelon.

© Office Workers

(1) Make mistakes in quantities of material when you are copying orders. Confuse similar names. Use wrong addresses.

(2) Prolong correspondence with government bureaus.

(3) Misfile essential documents.

(4) In making carbon copies, make one too few, so that an extra copying job will have to be done.

(5) Tell important callers the boss is busy or talking on another telephone.

(6) Hold up mail until the next collection.

(7) Spread disturbing rumors that sound like inside dope.

(d) Employees

(1) Work slowly. Think out ways to increase the number of movements necessary on your job …

(2) Contrive as many interruptions to your work as you can …

(3) Even if you understand the language, pretend not to understand instructions in a foreign tongue.

(4) Pretend that instructions are hard to understand, and ask to have them repeated more than once. Or pretend that you are particularly anxious to do your work, and pester the foreman with unnecessary questions.

(5) Do your work poorly and blame it on bad tools, machinery, or equipment. Complain that these things are preventing you from doing your job right.

(6) Never pass on your skill and experience to a new or less skillful worker.

(7) Snarl up administration in every possible way. Fill out forms illegibly so that they will have to be done over; make mistakes or omit requested information in forms.

(8) If possible, join or help organize a group for presenting employee problems to the management. See that the procedures adopted are as inconvenient as possible for the management, involving the presence of a large number of employees at each presentation, entailing more than one meeting for each grievance, bringing up problems which are largely imaginary, and so on.

(9) Misroute materials.

(10) Mix good parts with unusable scrap and rejected parts.

(12) General Devices for Lowering Morale and Creating Confusion

(a) Give lengthy and incomprehensible explanations when questioned.

…

© Act stupid.

(d) Be as irritable and quarrelsome as possible without getting yourself into trouble.

(e) Misunderstand all sorts of regulations concerning such matters as rationing, transportation, traffic regulations.

…

(i) Cry and sob hysterically at every occasion …

…

(k) Do not cooperate in salvage schemes.