I am fully aware. But notice I said that the issue for me has been lifelong. During and after pubertal age, I never developed in that manner. I have been taking an SSRI for only the past few months. That leaves 15+ years prior to taking an SSRI or any sort of medications whatsoever where I had no libido. In my case, it was not caused by any medication. It was lifelong.
I am female! I hope my testosterone isn’t too high lol. I have always had incredibly regular periods as well so I doubt there is any sort of issue with that going on.
Some testosterone is important for women’s health too! It isn’t exclusively a male hormone though men do naturally produce more.
Please have a frank and open discussion with a health professional. There is nothing to be embarrassed about and you deserve the full range of the human experience.
you deserve the full range of the human experience.
Please remember that if someone is sex repulsed or doesn’t feel sexual desire that this is a weird thing to say. There are so many things humans can experience, with varying degrees of joy and pleasure, sex is not in some special category of “required in order to be human”. From my perspective if someone hasn’t had a perfectly ripe mango they haven’t had the full range of human experience, but some people don’t like mangos.
sex is not in some special category of “required in order to be human”
Thanks for this. It’s just such an innate biological urge in 99% of people that not experiencing it actually has often made me feel like I’m not a human. It’s as basic as getting hungry when you need food or being thirsty when you need water. Idk. I appreciate the words is all, as feeling “not human” has been such a nearly lifelong struggle with this.
I will say though…when people talk about how amazing “mangoes” are, it does make me feel a bit left out even regardless of the “being human” aspect. The way people describe orgasms…it’s like they have access to some form of heroin and I don’t lol. I have a bit of FOMO wanting to be able to have an experience with such extreme pleasure.
Well…while I said there is nothing wrong with my hormones, I do have quite a bit of excess facial and body hair in a male pattern. So I think I likely have higher than normal testosterone in addition to the normal female hormones causing everything beyond the hair to be “regular”. So I don’t know that that’s the issue either.
Aces exist, there is nothing wrong with not feeling sexual desire or attraction. If it doesn’t upset her or effect her life in a way she doesn’t like then she doesn’t need medical intervention.
As someone who is demi and has lived many years at a time as essentially ace, it’s frustrating to hear people consistently downplay asexuality as a physical ailment. No, some people are just like this, it’s as valid an orientation as any other.
Wanting a higher libido and having zero libido is a problem. Encouraging a person to seek medical advice on an issue they have expressed is a problem is the responsible thing to do.
At no time did they state they were ace and at no point did I claim being ace is ‘invalid’ or a problem.
You are projecting your own frustrations onto the conversation when it isn’t about you.
I didn’t see anything in her posts that implied she wanted a higher libido or that she saw her lack of sexual desire as an issue in her day to day life. I did see her say she might like intimate human connection but that’s perfectly possible without sex. I think we might both be doing some projection, as yes I am sensitive to people who recommend seeing a doctor when someone describes what its like to be ace, but also you seem to assume having sex is a prerequisite to having an intimate relationship with someone.
I am fully aware. But notice I said that the issue for me has been lifelong. During and after pubertal age, I never developed in that manner. I have been taking an SSRI for only the past few months. That leaves 15+ years prior to taking an SSRI or any sort of medications whatsoever where I had no libido. In my case, it was not caused by any medication. It was lifelong.
You may have chronically low testosterone but this is an issue you would need to discuss in detail with your doctor.
I am female! I hope my testosterone isn’t too high lol. I have always had incredibly regular periods as well so I doubt there is any sort of issue with that going on.
Some testosterone is important for women’s health too! It isn’t exclusively a male hormone though men do naturally produce more.
Please have a frank and open discussion with a health professional. There is nothing to be embarrassed about and you deserve the full range of the human experience.
Please remember that if someone is sex repulsed or doesn’t feel sexual desire that this is a weird thing to say. There are so many things humans can experience, with varying degrees of joy and pleasure, sex is not in some special category of “required in order to be human”. From my perspective if someone hasn’t had a perfectly ripe mango they haven’t had the full range of human experience, but some people don’t like mangos.
Thanks for this. It’s just such an innate biological urge in 99% of people that not experiencing it actually has often made me feel like I’m not a human. It’s as basic as getting hungry when you need food or being thirsty when you need water. Idk. I appreciate the words is all, as feeling “not human” has been such a nearly lifelong struggle with this.
I will say though…when people talk about how amazing “mangoes” are, it does make me feel a bit left out even regardless of the “being human” aspect. The way people describe orgasms…it’s like they have access to some form of heroin and I don’t lol. I have a bit of FOMO wanting to be able to have an experience with such extreme pleasure.
Ooo ooo, I don’t like mango! Fresh or otherwise!
Well…while I said there is nothing wrong with my hormones, I do have quite a bit of excess facial and body hair in a male pattern. So I think I likely have higher than normal testosterone in addition to the normal female hormones causing everything beyond the hair to be “regular”. So I don’t know that that’s the issue either.
Aces exist, there is nothing wrong with not feeling sexual desire or attraction. If it doesn’t upset her or effect her life in a way she doesn’t like then she doesn’t need medical intervention.
As someone who is demi and has lived many years at a time as essentially ace, it’s frustrating to hear people consistently downplay asexuality as a physical ailment. No, some people are just like this, it’s as valid an orientation as any other.
Wanting a higher libido and having zero libido is a problem. Encouraging a person to seek medical advice on an issue they have expressed is a problem is the responsible thing to do.
At no time did they state they were ace and at no point did I claim being ace is ‘invalid’ or a problem.
You are projecting your own frustrations onto the conversation when it isn’t about you.
I didn’t see anything in her posts that implied she wanted a higher libido or that she saw her lack of sexual desire as an issue in her day to day life. I did see her say she might like intimate human connection but that’s perfectly possible without sex. I think we might both be doing some projection, as yes I am sensitive to people who recommend seeing a doctor when someone describes what its like to be ace, but also you seem to assume having sex is a prerequisite to having an intimate relationship with someone.
It’s not.
This doesn’t come across as her being happy with the situation.
I never once mentioned a relationship.
I see, I didn’t interpret that paragraph that way