(note: i myself am not a femboy nor a man)

be nice, dont fetishize ppl, have respect

  • Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    3 days ago

    The use of “tranny” there bothers me. Like, ok, people think femboys are trans women when they not, and I get that part. But why use the slur? The idea is the femboy is saying this, he should know the correct terms to use. The meme works just as well with “I am not a trans women” instead.

    • apotheotic (she/her)@beehaw.org
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      3 days ago

      The (hypothetical) femboy is quoting language that has been used about/against them. It is perfectly acceptable for someone who has been a victim of derisive language to use that same language to retell.

      • Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        3 days ago

        I have to disagree with you there. It is up to the people the slur is intended to refer to, to reclaim it. I have been called the R word before. I have no intellectual disability. It is very much not my place to try to reclaim it.

        But regardless, the theoretical femboy in the meme isn’t reclaiming the word, he is denying being a part of that group while using a slur for that group. That’s not reclaiming, that’s rejecting it for themself but accepting it for trans women.

      • Straßenkatze [She/They]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        3 days ago

        To steelman Ashen a bit here, it would not be the place for the hypothetical Femboy to reclaim a slur that was thrown at them because the hypothetical idiot was also just stupid and thought the Femboy was Transfem. It is not a Femboy Slur but a Transfem Slur, and a Femboy copping it would be controversial. There is already the tension that plays out between the two packs in the LGBTQ+ Clan, not really a reason to add more fuel to that fire.

        You are correct broadly speaking though: The victim is in the right to reclaim victimizing language so that fools can no longer wield it as a weapon. It is just that in this case, the language used was not victimizing(in the sense of the word itself being degrading specifically against the hypothetical Femboy), it was the (assumed) context that the hypothetical idiot knew the person was a Femboy and used it as a double-slice against the Clan and against the hypothetical Femboy by mislabeling them in general.

        • apotheotic (she/her)@beehaw.org
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          2 days ago

          To be clear I’m not saying that a femboy can or should “reclaim” the word for their general use. My intent was to state that if someone (who, due to their identity, may well suffer the same or similar nature of verbal/emotional/physical abuse as transfem folk, including the use of the same pejorative) is routinely called the T-slur due to their identity and presentation, they are, in my opinion, totally entitled to use the word specifically in calling out the use of it against them.

          • Straßenkatze [She/They]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            2 days ago

            I understand your trail of thought. I am not necessarily decrying it, hence why I mentioned it would be “controversial,” which, well, we have seen play out in this comment section as a whole.

            I would not condemn a Femboy for an annoyed clap-back at somebody for it, but I also would not blame a transfem in earshot to believe the Femboy was a hostile packmate.

    • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

      I think it being there is part of the point. It, more than anything else, highlights that the kind of pigeonholing the meme is about comes from a place of ignorance for sure, with a tie towards the same misogyny and bigotry that fuels transphobes.

      The femboy in the image is objecting to the term not just for himself, but as part and parcel of hate.