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tromars@feddit.de to Programmer Humor@lemmy.ml · 2 years ago

Ideas for programming rizz?

i.imgur.com

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Ideas for programming rizz?

i.imgur.com

tromars@feddit.de to Programmer Humor@lemmy.ml · 2 years ago
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  • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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    2 years ago

    “Girl, I named no variables after you, because you’re my only Constant”

    • (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻@programming.dev
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      2 years ago

      smooth 👍

    • Supertramper@feddit.de
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      2 years ago

      You’ll need an exception handler for all those dropping panties.

    • TerryTPlatypus@beehaw.org
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      2 years ago

      “Girl, you are my Two’s Complement, you’re always my plus one on any occaision”

      Cuz if you invert the bits of of a binary number and add one you get its negative number, so your girlfried is an equal part of you

      • agent_flounder@lemmy.one
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        2 years ago

        Damn son save some for the rest of us.

  • cantstopthesignal@sh.itjust.works
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    2 years ago

    Pay for dinner

    • Leo_agiad@sh.itjust.works
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      2 years ago

      This man fights in the shade.

    • MajorHavoc@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      For being a sick burn, that was ice cold. I love it.

    • Caboose12000@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      lmfao savage

  • Caveman@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    I forked an opensource project to add a couple features for my wife. 😊

    • some_designer_dude@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      And? Did she accept your, err, pull request? 😏

      • Caveman@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        “LGTM, merged” 😏

        • dukk@programming.dev
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          2 years ago

          Remember kids, always use protected branches.

          • lseif@sopuli.xyz
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            2 years ago

            and remember, no means no. if git doesnt want you to merge, dont --force it

          • dodslaser@feddit.nu
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            2 years ago

            Pushing directly to main just feels better.

            • doppelgangmember@lemmy.world
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              2 years ago

              I prefer “master”

    • Apathy Tree@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 years ago

      This is the kind of love I need in life 💜

      So cute! And practical!

  • ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works
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    2 years ago

    Once when I was still a kid, I told a woman I loved her so much that I could only love her more if she was a robot.

    She did not think that was romantic.

    • UnRelatedBurner@sh.itjust.works
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      2 years ago

      there are so many things wrong with this

      • Caboose12000@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        I think it’s kinda sweet for a kid. I mean what’s cooler than a robot when you’re 7? that’s pretty much the pinnicle of “cool” at that age, or at least it was for me. So to compare a crush to a robot for a kid is similar to shakespear comparing thier lover to “a summer’s day” or Selena Gomez comparing thier lover to “a love song”

        • ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works
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          2 years ago

          I, uh, wasn’t 7. I was about 10 years older than that and just dumb.

    • mindbleach@sh.itjust.works
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      2 years ago

      I met someone who looks a lot like you, she does the things you do, but she is an IBM.

  • Jtskywalker@lemm.ee
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    2 years ago

    I made a website for my wife with a list of a ton of reasons why I love her and each time she taps the screen it shows a new one.

    So… that is a thing you can do for the cost of a domain name and some cheap hosting.

    • wviana@lemmy.eco.br
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      2 years ago

      How many reasons did you code into it?

      • Jtskywalker@lemm.ee
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        2 years ago

        I don’t know, I’d have to check the database. I add to it every once in a while so it keeps growing. I think I started with around 20 or so

        • sic_1@feddit.de
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          2 years ago

          Aw man that’s so cute! Great idea, hope she appreciates it.

        • SnowBunting@lemmy.ml
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          2 years ago

          Do you check the list to make sure there aren’t any repeats?

          • QuazarOmega@lemy.lol
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            2 years ago

            Me when
            When I fail my DSA course

  • Nsh@lemmy.ca
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    2 years ago

    The creator of MySQL, MaxDB and MariaDB named them after his children My, Max and Maria, so why not

    • dan@upvote.au
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      2 years ago

      after his children My

      I thought you were kidding, but his daughter is actually named “My”.

      • The Ramen Dutchman@ttrpg.network
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        2 years ago

        It helps that it’s a name in another language (Finnish), where “my” isn’t a word, at all.

    • thank_me_its_friday@feddit.de
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      2 years ago

      Then what’s about MongoDB?

      • WindInTrees@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        Hi, it’s me, Mongo.

  • neuracnu@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 years ago

    “The two hardest problems in programming are cache invalidation, naming things and off-by-one errors.”

    • Rikudou_Sage@lemmings.world
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      2 years ago

      The original have been quite great even without adding the bit about off-by-one errors.

  • naevaTheRat@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 years ago

    I was thinking about you when I cleaned up this codebase and removed a lot of redundant functions.

    • float@feddit.de
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      2 years ago

      That sounds more like breaking up.

      • QuazarOmega@lemy.lol
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        2 years ago

        The employee that left the mess was already long gone unfortunately

      • Llewellyn@lemm.ee
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        2 years ago

        DuH

  • zeekaran@sopuli.xyz
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    2 years ago

    I wrote an automation specifically for my partner to unlock the front door when they arrive home.

    Also we got a sexy time button.

    Home Assistant is a path to what many would consider… Unnatural.

  • efrique@lemm.ee
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    2 years ago

    git branch testing.stephanie.slept.with.my.friend.brad

    • SpaceCowboy@lemmy.ca
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      Pull request rejected.

      • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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        2 years ago

        Man, I’ve never seen such a rapid succession of git pull and git push

  • halvar@lemm.ee
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    2 years ago

    Name a linux distro after her and yourself. Always works.

  • geekworking@lemmy.world
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    You can also combine your names into a Linux distribution.

    Deb + Ian = Debian.

    • SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml
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      2 years ago

      I bet they’ve broken up since

      • MrothersInArms@lemmy.zip
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        The word “Debian” was formed as a portmanteau of the first name of his then-girlfriend (later ex-wife) Debra Lynn and his own first name

        Wiki

        • mindbleach@sh.itjust.works
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          “Later ex-wife” is like three tenses of information at once.

          • Brahm1nmam@lemmy.sdf.org
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            2 years ago

            Peak efficiency

        • SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml
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          2 years ago

          Debra must be so pissed by now

          • hansl@lemmy.ml
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            2 years ago

            “I’m sorry you merged WHAT upstream? No I don’t care if there’s a new glibc out there, the one we have works just fine.”

      • andrew@lemmy.stuart.fun
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        2 years ago

        Had tons of kids though. Have you met the buntu family?

  • moog@lemm.ee
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    Sure, but at least they won’t be afraid of commitment.

  • stephfinitely@artemis.camp
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    2 years ago

    This person misunderstands a beautiful function code can be very sexy or maybe I’m a odd girl.

    • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
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      var LogicGate = map[string]string{
          "OR": "OR",
          "AND":  "AND",
          "NOT": "NOT",
          "NOR": "NOR",
          "NAND": "NOR",
          "XOR": "XOR",
      }
      
      func isLogicGate(inString string) (bool) {
          _, ok := LogicGate[strings.ToUpper(inString)]
          if ok {
              return true
          } else {
              return false
          }
      }
      
      func stringAsGateLogic(inString string) (bool, error) {
          inSplit := strings.Split(inString, " ")
          var phrase1 strings.Builder
          var phrase2 stringa.Builder
          var gateString string
          for word := range inSplit {
              if isLogicGate(word) {
                  if len(gateString) < 1{
                      gateString = word
                  } else {
                      phrase2.WriteString(word)
                  }
              } else {
                  if len(gateString) < 1{
                      phrase1.WriteString(word)
                  } else {
                      phrase2.WriteString(word)
                  }
              }
          }
          boolPhrase1 := bool(phrase1.String())
          boolPhrase2 := bool(phrase2.String())
          switch strings.ToUpper(gateString) {
              case "OR":
                  return (boolPhrase1 || boolPhrase2), nil
              case "AND":
                  return (boolPhrase1 && boolPhrase2), nil
              case "NOT":
                  return (!boolPhrase2), nil
              case "NOR":
                  return (!(boolPhrase1 || boolPhrase2)), nil
              case "NAND":
                  return (!(boolPhrase1 && boolPhrase2)
              case "XOR":
                  orRes := (boolPhrase1 || boolPhrase2)
                  nandRes := (!(boolPhrase1 && boolPhrase2))
                  return (orRes && nandRes), nil
              default:
                  return false, fmt.Errorf("Why you do dis?: %v", inString)
          }
      }
      
      func main(){
          answer, err := stringAsGateLogic ("This person misunderstands a beautiful function code can be very sexy or maybe I'm a odd girl.")
          if err != nil {
              fmt.Println(err)
          }
          fmt.Println(answer)
      }
      
      • deegeese@sopuli.xyz
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        2 years ago

        Sorry, Hungarian notation is not beautiful.

        • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
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          2 years ago

          Fair.

      • wallmenis@lemmy.one
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        2 years ago

        isLogicGate is not used. Maybe you mean to place it in “isGate” in the stringAsGateLogic for loop’s if statement?

        • nickwitha_k (he/him)@lemmy.sdf.org
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          2 years ago

          Thank you. That’s what I get for writing a drawn-out shitpost program on my phone over several hours while away from home, instead of in a few minutes in vim.

          • AVincentInSpace@pawb.social
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            2 years ago

            Speaking of, Vim is actually quite easy to set up on Android. Simply download Termux from F-Droid (the version of Termux on Google Play is severely out of date) and pkg install vim (or nvim if you prefer). (Also, full aarch64 linux terminal on non-rooted Android, woo!) Using Vim with an onscreen keyboard is agonizing, of course, but it does work (Termux provides the Ctrl and Esc keys). The F-Droid app Unexpected Keyboard is a recommended addition – it’s an alternative on-screen keyboard with no predictive text and swiping to the corners of each key for alternate symbols. It makes using Vim on a touchscreen at least moderately less painful.

  • crunchpaste@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 years ago

    Well, I made my girlfriend a GUI app that converts subtitles from Windows-1251 to utf-8 encoding so that she doesn’t have to remember how to do it. And I didn’t even name it after her…

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